“Love your neighbor as you love yourself” doesn’t mean to be nice to people. It reveals the truth that we can only love others to the degree that we love ourselves.

It is very hard to have compassion, or even be non-judgmental, if you cannot sit with your own truth. If the fact of your wounds, and the fact of your tenderness, make you cringe, how can you possibly see the wounds of another or show tenderness to them?

It is vital that we are able to see ourselves – to look at ourselves plainly and be able to say “yes, these things are all part of me” without persecuting the whole for some of the parts.

So before you go trying to change yourself, start with being able to face the self you are. There is power in wholeness. There is power in being able to sit with who and what you are RIGHT NOW, before you tear it apart and try to build someone else.

Think about it – if your personal growth is driven by an inability to accept yourself as you are, with the idea that you will accept yourself once you are a more preferred way, what kind of love is that?